From Rock Bottom to Real Estate: How I Rebuilt My Life After a Decades of Pain

For ten years, I was married. And for the last six of those years, it felt like I was fighting a war I couldn’t win.

My husband turned to alcohol as a way to cope with life, and slowly, the person I married disappeared. I fought like hell to save our marriage — staying up late trying to fix the unfixable, reading every self-help book I could find, suggesting counseling, offering solutions, doing everything I could just to keep our family intact. But when one person is fighting alone, it’s not a battle — it’s a slow drowning.

The emotional, verbal, and eventually physical abuse crept in like a storm I didn’t see coming. I became isolated, depressed, and numb. I poured what little energy I had into the things that made me feel somewhat human — gardening, sewing, raising chickens, and tending to my little homestead. Those small joys kept me alive, but they weren’t enough to save my soul.

I started slipping away. Anxiety and depression became my normal. I lost myself completely.

The Turning Point

During the last two years of my marriage, I knew something had to change — not for him, but for me and my kids. A friend mentioned real estate, and while I knew next to nothing about the industry, something in me said, "Try it." So, I did.

I spent two months studying, not fully understanding how difficult and competitive this field really is. No one told me it takes years to build a reputation, a clientele, or a steady income. But somehow, I passed the exam on my first try.

The first brokerage I joined offered no support. I was on my own again — just like in my marriage. But then I met a woman opening a new brokerage. I took another risk and made the switch. That brokerage became my launching pad. They believed in me and taught me everything they could. I was fiercely loyal to them because they gave me something I hadn’t had in a long time — hope.

My first year, I closed two transactions. That may not sound like much, but in real estate, especially your first year, it’s a win.

Hitting Rock Bottom

I took a break in my second year. Things at home had gone from bad to worse. My husband lied to me again — a big lie — and didn’t come home. He chose alcohol, yet again, over us and over his own future. I was spiraling fast. I could barely keep my head above water and knew I needed real help — the kind you can't get from books or friends.

That’s when I checked myself into Recovery Ways in Utah.

During those two months, I found me. Not the broken woman shaped by abuse and trauma, but the person I was meant to be before life got in the way. I realized I wasn’t crazy. I was just a deeply hurt woman who had been in survival mode for far too long.

My childhood trauma — being molested, feeling unworthy, and never safe — led me to normalize abusive relationships. I had to learn how to set boundaries, say no, and most importantly, recognize my value.

A New Beginning

While in treatment, I met a man. His story was eerily similar to mine — the pain, the trauma, the fight to survive. We became friends first, and when we decided to take a chance on building something more, we did it our way — honest, slow, intentional.

I know it sounds crazy. I moved to Utah after my divorce and took a leap of faith with someone who, not long ago, was a complete stranger. But we made an agreement: to be friends first, to support each other, and to never go back to what broke us.

While settling into my new life, I studied the Utah real estate laws, took the test, and passed. I was now licensed in a new state with new challenges. But within my first three months, I closed four transactions.

The Deals That Gave Me Life

One of my first clients needed to sell their home fast due to a divorce. It was a tough situation — emotions were high, timelines were tight, and the pressure was on to get it done quickly and smoothly.

We held an open house shortly after listing, and that’s when something incredible happened: a buyer walked in, took one look around, and fell in love. It wasn’t just a house to them — it was their dream home.

But we weren’t in the clear just yet. The buyer still needed to sell their home before they could move forward. We were racing against the clock — if we couldn’t coordinate both deals, they risked losing the home they had fallen in love with.

I got to work immediately. We listed the buyer’s home, and within three weeks, I had bothproperties under contract. And that’s not all — I also helped the seller’s ex-wife find a new home. I managed to close all the transactions simultaneously and flawlessly.

Were there hiccups? Of course. Coordinating move-in and move-out dates on the same day with multiple parties wasn’t easy. But I worked closely with everyone involved, made sure communication stayed open, and together, we made it happen.

I was so proud — not just because of the sales, but because I helped three different families move forward, each with a fresh start.

Where I Am Now

I’m healing. I’m working hard. I’m building a career that not only supports my children but gives me a sense of purpose. I’m learning how to love again — both myself and someone who’s walked the same dark roads I have. It’s not your typical love story, and maybe that’s why it has a chance to really work.

I’m not who I was — and thank God for that.

What’s Next?

I’ll be sharing more about this new chapter — the unconventional relationship, the ups and downs of real estate in Utah, and my continued journey toward healing and happiness.

If you’re struggling right now, just know: it’s okay to start over. It’s okay to ask for help. And it’s okay to walk away from anything that’s slowly destroying you.

I did. And I’m finally free.

Thank you for being part of my journey. More updates soon — especially about the crazy, beautiful way this new relationship is unfolding. It’s definitely not what I expected… but maybe it’s exactly what I needed.